Live workshop · next date coming

Should you stay or should you go

Bring the decision you've been stuck on for over a year. Leave with a clear direction and a first step already taken.

60 minutes
Live on Zoom
Tell me when the next one is

I'm not running one right now. Leave your email and you'll hear first.

5frameworks, yours to keep
60minutes, live with me
2pages, filled in by the end
1experiment, started before you leave

Does this sound like you?

Sunday night you're definitely leaving. By Tuesday it isn't that bad. Friday you're googling business ideas again
You've made the spreadsheet. Possibly twice
Every option you can see costs you something you don't want to give up
You keep waiting to feel ready, and ready keeps not arriving
Your job is genuinely fine, which somehow makes it worse
You've been "about to" for so long it's become a personality trait

More thinking isn't what's missing. You've thought about this ten thousand times. You don't have an information problem, you have a process problem, and no amount of new input has ever fixed one of those.

Why the usual advice hasn't worked

What you've been told

  • Get clear first, then act
  • Follow your passion
  • Wait until you're ready
  • Take the personality test
  • Fix the résumé, find the next job
  • Trust your gut

What actually closes it

  • Clarity comes out of the experiment, not before it
  • You can love the work and refuse the life
  • Ready never arrives. A date does
  • Your imagination is a bad witness. Go and find out
  • Close the decision first or you'll take the wrong job
  • Your gut knows the pattern, not the facts

What we do in the hour

  1. Diagnose Your Discontent

    Your unhappiness lives on a specific ring. Role, boss, company, industry, career, or life. Most people make a career-sized change to fix a job-sized problem, and the ring you're actually on decides how big this has to be.
  2. Price Your Paths

    Leaving costs something. So does staying, and almost nobody adds that column up. You'll price both in money, time, energy, and who you'd have to stop being.
  3. Audit Your Agency

    Money, time, autonomy, place, meaning. You score where you are now, then weight them for the season you're actually in, because a 24-year-old and a 41-year-old with a kid should not be turning the same dial.
  4. Classify Your Crossing

    Door, bridge, or cliff. Some people spend six months deliberating over something they could test on Thursday. Others want to resign tomorrow from something that deserves six months of runway.
  5. Build Your Bridge

    You don't jump, you lay a plank. Every experiment is one plank, and sometimes you get halfway across and realise you don't want the other island. That isn't a failed bridge. That's the bridge doing its job.

Some of you will finish this and decide to stay. That's a real outcome and I'll tell you when I think it's yours. The point isn't to get you out. It's to make staying a choice instead of a default.

And you don't leave until you've started

01

The two-minute move

Done in the room, before you log off. You open LinkedIn, you write the message, you send it. Not tonight. Now.

02

The next plank

One experiment, designed live, with a date on it inside seven days. Cheap enough that running it costs you almost nothing.

03

The stretch

The uncomfortable one that would actually settle this. You'll name it whether or not you're ready to do it, because naming it is most of the work.


Every decision is one of three things

Door

Cheap, and you can walk back through it.

Take the recruiter call. Publish the thing. Ask to go remote.

Open it.

Bridge

A real change, but you can test it in pieces.

Pivot careers. Go freelance. Move countries. Start the business.

Cross it a plank at a time.

Cliff

Expensive, and very hard to undo.

Quit with no runway. Sell the company. Spend $150k on the degree.

Stress-test it first.

The expensive mistake in this room is treating a door like a cliff. The other expensive mistake is the reverse, and it's the one nobody sees coming.

What you leave with

The real problem, circled on the ring it actually lives on
Both paths priced, including the column you've been ignoring
Five agency scores, weighted for the season you're in
Your crossing classified: door, bridge, or cliff
Your next plank, with a date on it
The Decision Map and the recording, yours to keep

We do the work live. You won't be sent home with homework, because homework doesn't get done. You'll finish the hour holding something.

Who it's for, and who it isn't

For you if: you're employed, you've got something on the side or a place you keep almost moving to, and you've been going back and forth for over a year.

Not for you if it's been under three months. You haven't been stuck, you've been thinking, and that usually sorts itself out.

Not if the decision belongs to someone else. I can't help you decide what your partner should do about their job.

And not if something just happened. If you're in the middle of a redundancy or a breakup, this is the wrong tool and I'll point you at a better one.

Why me

I'm obsessed with how people make decisions. Not in a productivity way. In a “how does somebody spend nine years on something they quietly stopped wanting” way.

I spent about ten years making music that never broke. I don't regret going after it. What I regret is going after it in a way that built nothing I could use afterwards. It ended and I was left holding almost no skill that transferred. If I could go back I wouldn't tell myself to want it less. I'd tell myself to chase the exact same thing in a way that paid me something either way.

I've also spent about ten years living abroad, and roughly half of that deciding whether to go. Since then I've talked a lot of people through their own version of it. Whether to move. Whether to keep the job. How to keep the job and move anyway.

I don't want you to build my version of a good life. I want you to get better at choosing yours.

Kia Orion

Questions

Do I have to say my decision out loud in front of everyone?

No. You'll type into the chat and work on your own worksheet. Speaking up is invited, never required, and plenty of people stay muted the whole time.

What if I can't make it live?

Book anyway. Everyone who books gets the recording. You'll get less out of it, because the work happens live, but it's yours to keep. If the date genuinely doesn't work, there's a waitlist at the bottom of this page and I run these monthly.

Is this therapy?

No. Therapy is interested in why you are the way you are. I'm interested in one decision. One hour, about the thing rather than about you, and you leave with a date.

What if my decision isn't about a job?

Fine. Should I move, should I leave, should I finally start the thing. Same shape, and the framework doesn't care about the noun.

Will you tell me what to do?

I'll tell you what I think and why, and I'll tell you when I think you should stay. What I won't do is hand you a pros and cons list, because that's what you've been doing alone for two years and it hasn't worked.

Is there a pitch at the end?

There's an invitation and it takes about two minutes. If you want to keep working together there's a way to do that. If you don't, you've still got everything you came for.

One hour, and it's closed

You've spent two years on this. The question isn't whether $49 is a lot. It's whether you want to spend another two not answering it.

Want to know when I run the next one?

There's no date on the calendar right now. Leave your email and I'll tell you when there is. That's the only thing I'll use it for.

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